Saturday, July 19, 2008

Of kindred spirits and Souls

Over coffee last night, my former student Jo gave me some food for thought. She suddenly asked me if I believe in soulmates, and what my concept of a soulmate is. I answered the first question in the affirmative, and I defined a soulmate as someone to whom I need not explain what I think a soulmate is. S/he would just know, because our thoughts and feelings would be that finely attuned to one another's. Jo then brought up the idea of having more than one soulmate, which I hadn't seriously considered before. For 10 years now, I've known and felt with absolute certainty that my best friend Raqs is my soulmate, but I never entertained the notion of having soulmates in addition to her.

I suppose it is possible to have multiple soulmates, although I have yet to meet someone with whom I share a connection as profound as what Raqs and I have. With Raqs, I don't even need to say anything, and I know she knows what's going through my mind. There is no such thing as an uncomfortable silence between us (we've tried, it just doesn't happen). We don't need to keep in constant touch with one another, we don't need to be aware of every little thing that goes on in our separate lives, because when we are together, it's like we've never spent a single minute apart. She gets me like no one else does, not even my family; she's the only one who sees who I am to the very core.

Aside from Raqs, there ARE a handful of people who share a special bond with me that transcends ordinary friendship. I refer to them as my kindred spirits (and funny enough, Jo is one of them, although she regards kindred spirits and soulmates as the same thing). These kindred spirits are people I click with almost instantly, and with whom I maintain a closeness despite age difference, distance, or time apart. There's that certain sense of recognition, of looking into a mirror and seeing qualities, outlooks and values similar to my own, and above all, a level of comfort and confidence that comes easily, naturally. I'm not exactly a very friendly person, and it takes me a while to warm up to acquaintances, so when there are rare instances of me hitting it off with someone right away, there's got to be something more there than just plain compatibility.

I count myself blessed to have met such kindred spirits in my life: Jo; Sir Tirol, my Yoda; Maddy, my personal shrink; Jen Ong, my Mini-Me; Bel, my soul sister... they may not necessarily be my soulmates, but they apprehend, understand and appreciate the kind of soul I am, and I am grateful that they have bared even a part of their souls to me. It's a great, ineffable, beautiful mystery how,
without any deliberate effort or extrinsic intention, not only lives intersect, but selves conjoin. As my favorite author E.L. Konigsburg wrote in The View From Saturday:

...she asked, "Did I choose you, or did you choose me?"
And The Souls answered, "Yes!"

Jo, I know you'll get that. :)


At Monday, July 21, 2008, Anonymous mini-me said...

2 more weeks 2 more weeks! :) i miss you oodles doc. :)

At Monday, July 21, 2008, Blogger Ailee Through the Looking Glass said...

I miss you right back Mini-me! =D Hurry home! Let's have dinner with Jo when you get back. :)


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